Lick My Love Spuds

by Nostril Shorts

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Octo Seven Because' it's feckin hilarious. Favorite track: DOD - Sex is Fun.
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A beautiful collection of intimate love songs

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released March 2, 2011

All music and lyrics by: Garry Carroll

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Nostril Shorts Shannon, Ireland

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Track Name: DOD - Smells like fish, Tastes like chicken
drifting in my micra just having a laugh
and i notice there's a nursing home that's looking for staff.
i do a six point turn and i bolt on back
and i hand in my ciriculum vitae just for the craic…literally.
3 weeks later and they call my phone
and ask if i would wash an OAP from tyrone.
she's all lathered up and she's covered in foam.
it's happy days and i'm the fonzy of this nursing home.

holy sweet jesus, thanks to god up above.
she's taking out her teeth and she's ready for love.
she's very mature, that's why her hips keeps clicking,
it smells like fish but it tastes like chicken.

the second day on the job
and i pull out my knob
and i wrap the dirty fucker up in vaseline gauze.
i'm looking after bridie cause she's got menopause
i stick my finger up her ass and whipe shit under her schnozz…. dirty sanchez.

stiff as a poker
and poke her i will.
I'm a loaded super soaker and i'm ready to spill.
she slides i the bath with her rubber duck
but i can't scrub her tits cause they're as saggy as fuck… saggy tittes.
i'm nursing a semi, she better stand back
or the poor old bitch will have a heart attack.
i park up my micra, hope it doesn't get towed
cause the engine's overheating, i'm about to explode.

holy sweet jesus, thanks to god up above.
she's taking out her teeth and she's ready for love.
she can't walk up the stairs
she has a chair on a rail.
it smells like crab but it tastes like quail.

there's a bowl by the bed incase she's feeling unwell.
her sheets are stained and there's a really damp smell.
i think i'll reconsider cause it's not looking pleasant.
she smells like cod but she tastes like pheasant.

so i've been working here for a week and a half now.
i haven't got my first pay check yet
because i've to work a week in hand
but you all know i don't just use my hands,
i use my penis aswell…. whataboutya.

holy sweet jesus, thanks to god up above.
she's taking out her teeth and she's ready for love.
I'm nursing a semi cause her lingo is flirty
it smells like trout but i tastes like turkey.

there's a bowl by the bed incase she's feeling unwell.
her sheets are stained and there's a really damp smell.
i'm kinda second guessing cause it looks very loose.
it smells like tuna but she tastes like goose.